So all too quickly it’s Wednesday again, and therefore Blogenge entry day, with this week’s theme being ‘If I wasn’t me, I’d be…’. I was going to try and be short and sweet and just answer ’someone else’, but I thought that that might defeat the object and the purpose of the Blogenge.

Then I was going to put ‘James, so that I could be married to me’ or ‘Jody, so I could be my own sister’ but thought that this would lead to all kinds of complications in the actual writing of the post, and indeed, in my brain.  So, I decided to think about it more carefully.

And so, I came up with the person I would most like to be if I wasn’t me; the person who I would most like to be for just a few hours to see what life was like in their shoes (except obviously, they would be my shoes because I would now be that person and thus own their footwear).

Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce my(new)self: the one and only (apart from the other one) Cheryl Cole.

Now I know you will be shocked.  Why would I want to be someone with whom I already have so many striking similarities? Some of you may be surprised to learn that I am not already, in fact, the grown up Ms Tweedy. The likeness is, indeed, uncanny on all kinds of levels: the amazing singing voice (Martin, you remember ‘Think of Me’ surely?), the hair that’s ‘totally worth it’ (I’ve come a long way since the mistaken perm of 1987)  and the amazing dress sense paving the way for fashionistas everywhere (it was me who put the ‘leisure’ in the leisure suit, and don’t you forget it).

But I’d like to do the other Cheryl things which, alas, I just don’t have time to do in a normal day.  I’d like to sit next to Simon Cowell on X Factor (and more importantly, I’d like to know the difference in sound between the Studio X Factor and that on the television, because it’s blatantly clear that the two cannot possibly be the same…).  I’d like to be an ambassador for charities, and I’d like to walk down a red carpet and win awards, just to see what all the fuss is really about.  I’d like to be the likeable girl next door, and I’d like to have a number one record.

But then there’s being married to Ashley Cole. Oh.  Now that may sound like a ‘cruel’ oh, but it’s really not meant to be (though admittedly, he does play for Chelsea, and thus, it would be understandable).  I’d need to be married to James still (don’t think he’d have any objections…) and obviously, there’d still need to be Sam (but the non Cole version – the Wiggle genes are way too important!)

I suppose Simon Cowell would lose his strange charm if I actually met him, and if I was in the X Factor studio, I might find that the Twins could actually sing, and that would be too much to take.  And I suppose I do my bit for all my favourite charities, and I guess it might mean less if I had more (moneywise, if you get my drift). And now you come to mention it, I did win a Bolsover Community Award in the summer (well, I made the acceptance speech anyway), Bert and Midge next door seem to like me, and who needs a number one record when you have sung on the Palterton Primary School CD? 

All in all then, I’m guess I’m happy being me, and not just for the reasons above.  Cole, I salute you, and I’ll always have my ‘Aspire to be Cheryl’ days, but for now, I’ll stick with being me…

Unless, of course, you ditch the footballer, and stop wearing tulip shaped skirts.  Then, and only then, can we  do business.